Edge Control + Nappy hair=sadness

   

    Alas another perilous quest for the elusive goal known as edges on fleek has ended in the tragic squandering of my hard earned dollars. For some time now I’ve known full well that the aforementioned edge control, now the newest phenomenon in black hair care, was a cruel farce and overpriced rebranding of hair Jam with the same poor results. Yet maddeningly I appear to be the only one who noticed this. Regrettably, armed as I am with what is apparently rare knowledge I still find myself swept into the feverish obsession which continues to plague nappy headed black women and girls everywhere, finding the perfect edge control for unrelaxed hair. At this point I must have tried ten different brands ranging from 6-10 of my hard earned dollars (that’s a lot to me btw. Raised by the original Diva on a Dime means overpaying is against my religion) and have been let down. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME!

  Seriously though I can’t be the only one who’s noticed that this shit doesn’t work on exscreamly course hair (exscreamly; adverb meaning describing something so extra it makes you want to scream). Now don’t get me wrong. It may work on fine curls, loose waves, tight waves, kinky curls and anyone who has “baby hair” instead of edges but it damn sure don’t work for my nappy headed ass. Some of yawl may look at my picture, notice my light skin and think I’m mixed. I am not, both my parent’s are black and both of their parents were black so I inherited some certified, bonafide, southern fried real Negro hair.

   Still I have a light completion so folks assume that I got whatcha grandma would call that good hair. Brief side note the term good hair isn’t nearly as offensive as us nappy headed folks have taken it over the years. Sure some people are either deliberately or inadvertently using the term good hair to reinforce Eurocentric beauty standards by implying that the “best” looking back women have to have European features/blood.  But your grandmother and mother likely meant good hair as in low maintenance since they were the ones who had to comb it. It still used to hurt slightly when my mother said it because I didn’t understand what she meant until she recently explained it to me.

  Now I’m finally trying to embrace my natural hair and grow out my relaxer but my edges just can’t get right. Back to punk ass overpriced Edge control and why we subject ourselves to the physiological torture of applying said edge control and being pleased with the initial results only to have it fail us before we’ve finished getting dressed much less driven to our destination. To this day the only thing that has ever worked for me is a jar of one dollar and fifty cent Pro-Style gel by Ampro. Of course even Pro-Style doesn’t work as well now that my hair is completely without the relaxer but if I apply it then let it dry under a scarf I can achieve the desired results. That edge control though? Scarf no scarf its crap either way.

  If someone knows otherwise, hair stylist or fellow nappy headed sister, please feel free to correct me. Of course if you do claim to have found an edge control that works on very course hair we gon’ need to see a photo as proof of your texture as well as time stamped before and after pictures to show it works for more than ten minutes. Also fair warning; if one of yawl recommend some 15, 20 shit then swear it works and I buy it but it doesn’t actually work for longer than ten minutes I will…well since this is the internet there’s not really much I can do to you but still don’t do it.